In class, we talked about emotion
in genders and how females are over emotional while men actively hide their emotions.
Immediately, I thought of how I did not
fit that “mold.”
I am typically an extremely happy
person. When I get mad or sad, I am still laughing and always down-grade the
severity of whatever issue I have going on. For the longest time, I would joke
and say, “Oh I’m a girl, I don’t want to let people know that I’m upset and
burden them because I’m just supposed to be happy.” It recently dawned on me
that this is a crazy statement and that I should be able to open up to my
friends/family about what is going on in my life, even if it is negative. I am
always open to take on the burden of others and their problems, yet I cannot
stand when I do it to them.
One thing that Dr. Crafton said in
class today that really struck me was, “You can’t always be tough; you don’t
want to always be tough.” I really felt this because that’s exactly how I am.
During class, I kept thinking, “oh my gosh, my mind is like a man’s because I
never get emotional. But honestly, I think that these days, women are being
raised to not show emotion now too because we are expected to be happy, put
together, and ready to take on the task of caring for others. When I do
encounter a problem, such as recently when I had an extreme falling-out with my
older sister, I hold in my anger, sadness, and other negative emotions and
always tell people, “it’s whatever I’m fine” or “I’m over it, they’re not worth
my sadness.” When a few friends told me that I need to stop and that being sad
is ok, some of my guy friends would say, “come on you’re a girl it should be
programmed in you to be able to be upset and deal with it—it’s normal.”
My questions would be: do any of
you ladies feel the pressure to not burden people with your problems too, or do
you find that you feel guilt for confiding in people rather than just being
happy? Do you think that this is a problem of gender, or do you feel that this
is just a humans-in-general thing?
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